When your relationship gets serious, the next step is usually moving in together. Maybe you're applying for a BTO, or maybe you'll move into a condo once you're married. But what happens when things don't work out? Who gets the house if you break up or get divorced?

HDB

Forget marriage proposals. These days, the real question is: "Will you BTOgether with me?" We view it as the ultimate sign of commitment, a sign that you're ready to build a future together (literally).

But whether or not you want to admit it, a BTO isn't just a romantic gesture. It's a major financial and legal commitment. And given how long the process takes (four to five years before you can collect your keys), you might want to think twice before jumping into an application. You should be 100% sure of your partner because breaking up can get messy once a BTO is involved. But if you're already in this situation, here's what you need to know.

If you're in the early stages of your application, you can cancel it via the HDB Flat Portal under the 'My Flat Dashboard'. But of course, this comes with financial consequences. For example, if you've already selected a unit and signed the lease agreement, you'd have to forfeit 5% of the flat's purchase price. Let's say you purchased your flat at $400,000. That means you'll lose $20,000 for cancelling your BTO.

Unfortunately, neither of you can keep the flat unless one of your parents was originally listed in the flat application. Otherwise, you have to return the flat, and the compensation will be based on current rates, subject to HDB's approval. Anyway, if you want to know more about how to deal with a BTO breakup, I have just the article for you.

Private

Not everyone goes the BTO route. Some couples do choose to go for private properties instead, thinking it's a smart investment. But when love fades, who gets the house? Unlike HDB, which has clear regulations, private properties fall under general property laws.

So first things first, check the title deed. If the property is under one person's name, it legally belongs to them. Even if both of you chipped in for the down payment or mortgage, the law generally recognises the listed owner. However, the other party may still have a claim if they can prove their financial contributions. But generally speaking, it's best (especially for the non-listed owner) to end the relationship amicably and have a proper discussion, just in case.

If both names are on the title deed, you have a few ways to split the property:

• Sell and split: The cleanest way out is to sell the property and divide the proceeds according to your ownership share.

• Buy the other out: If one person wants to keep the property, they can buy out the other's share based on market value.

• Rent out: If you're both adamant about keeping the property, you can consider renting it out and splitting the rental income. But this means you have to stay in touch with each other, which not many people want to do post-breakup.

When you've tried everything, talked it out, mediated, gave it one last shot, but nothing's working, it's time to call it quits.

So who gets the house in the divorce?

If you have a prenup, things will be a lot simpler. If not, lawyers will have to get involved, and each case can bear different results. In Singapore, the court looks at several key factors to decide how to divide assets fairly in a divorce. This includes:

• How much each person contributed financially (direct contributions)

• Non-financial contributions, like taking care of the home and family (indirect contributions)

• The needs of the children, if any

• Any prior agreements made about dividing assets

In general, properties that were acquired during the marriage, including those received as gifts or inheritance, are considered matrimonial assets. Whereas property owned before marriage is not, unless it was regularly used by the family or both spouses contributed to improving it (ex: renovations).

Take this couple for example. The husband's mom had contributed half a million dollars to help the couple buy a home. In the divorce, it was ruled that the gift should be shared equally. High Court Judge Choo Han Teck also said that "Without clear and convincing evidence showing otherwise, a gift to a married couple should be treated as a gift to both parties. This flows from the union of the marriage and the view of marriage as a co-equal partnership."

And although the division of matrimonial assets is governed by the Women's Charter, it doesn't automatically favour women. It can also protect men, especially if the husband is financially dependent.

Just a few months ago, a man received an extra $1.3 million in his divorce after his appeal won partially. He was originally given 55% of the $13.2 million fortune, but his share was bumped up to 65% due to his indirect contributions to the family.

In any case, if one person wants to keep the house, they'll usually have to buy out the other person's share at market value or an agreed price. But if neither party wants (or can afford) to keep it, the house gets sold and things get even trickier.

Typically, the property can only be sold after the final judgment is issued, meaning the divorce is officially settled. After that, the court usually gives a 3 to 6-month deadline for selling the home. But if unexpected delays happen (like market conditions or external factors), the court may grant some flexibility as long as both parties cooperate.

However, if one party intentionally delays or blocks the sale, legal intervention might be required. That being said, it's best you start preparing for the sale even before the divorce is finalised. You can always consult with our agents and avoid unnecessary drama and legal fees.

HDB vs. private property: different rules, different outcomes

HDB has strict rules on who can take over ownership. As I've mentioned, neither of you can keep the flat unless one of your parents was originally listed in the flat application. In that case, selling the flat might be your only option. And if you haven't hit the Minimum Occupation Period (MOP), you need HDB's approval before you can sell or transfer the ownership.

If you're transferring ownership for other reasons like buying out your ex's share or passing the flat to a family member, HDB has a checklist of approved scenarios. But don't assume it's a done deal. As I've mentioned, you'll need their approval and you might even have to pay stamp duties. You can read more on HDB's guidelines here.

On the other hand, private properties are not subject to the same eligibility conditions as HDB flats. Ownership and division are typically determined by court orders or mutual agreements between the parties, as explained above. Plus, there is no MOP for private properties, allowing for more flexibility in selling or transferring ownership after the divorce.

No one goes into a relationship thinking about the breakup, but when real estate is involved, you can't afford to be naive. Between the legal process of asset division and HDB's strict rules, breaking up is extra hard when you share a home.

The best way to avoid all this is to plan ahead early in your relationship. Have an open discussion with your partner about finances, ownership, and what happens if things don't work out. It might feel unromantic now, but it could save you a lot of heartache (and money) later.

But if you're already in the thick of it, getting the right advice from legal and property experts can help you navigate the process smoothly. Love may be complicated, but dealing with a breakup doesn't have to be a total disaster.

If you're going through a separation involving property, talk to a professional. This article is just for general info and shouldn't be your only guide.

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